well i am just not even attempting to be sober. its sad but I'm in the middle of limbo and pretending I'm gonna be ok mostly good i think i am knowing that i will always come out on my feet. fuck the sun is about to come up i feel like I'm still tweaking and in jail. it scared me but he said he would be my boyfriend my my boyfriend said he's supposed to be my boyfriend…… N i be coolin wit the homies, I'm posted chillin smoking a cigarette sayin fuck him! talking about fashion like i know or give a fuck i just am trying to be a better girl live a better life like i have been for the past couple years. i gotta figure my shit out soon cuz i can't live life like this for much longer. what if i end up sipping lavender tea in a mansion and he knocks on my door and asks for all his shit back, standing next to the better version of me. "she can be evil ask fuck but I'm not keeping track of it so ima just get her sum chocolate." i told them i like don't want glasses cuz i like feeling the earth on my face. I'm spracked and in love with the saddest drug addict in the world.